Disney Princes Are Creepy Jerks
Transcript:
So I'm sort of writing a fairy tale retelling. Kind of. Not really. A little bit.
It's very, very loosely inspired.
However, it is a perfect excuse to research fairy tales. Which, I will admit, I love doing.
So I thought I'd start a new video series about all the weird facts and learning while researching my novel. They won't all be on the same topic. In fact, I think my next one is about the Spanish Influenza, which is a pretty big departure from fairy tales. But if you like learning fun facts and seeing me in weird costumes then subscribe and stick around!
Anyways, I've been doing a lot of research and I've come to a conclusion: Most fairytale princes are jerks.
Most have been purified or cleansed by Disney, but the source material reveals some not so wonderful dudes. When they announced Rapunzel was getting her own Disney debut I was a little curious because her story is probably the least kids appropriate of them all. Her prince repeatedly climbs up into her tower for weeks on end. Every day for weeks!
His plan for her to escape was to tie pieces of silk together that he'd bring her every day, just a tiny little piece instead of... you know, using that giant rope growing out of her head that he used to climb in every day?
But the stupidity of that plan isn't what gives them up. The plan is ruined when Mother Gothel asks Rapunzel why she needs her dress let out and Rapunzel's like, "Oh, I guess I ate a lot." But the answer is clearly instead that she's pregnant. Which means that this prince was coming to her tower everyday for a booty call. Instead of sending his armed guards to let her free.
That's not cool! That's not a nice thing to do to a maiden!
But he's not the only messed up prince. Lots of them are just as creepy. Snow White's prince kisses what looks to be a dead body with no prior indication that that would wake her up? In front of all of her mourning friends? And Cinderella's prince, he had every maiden in town try on her shoes. Every maiden in town! I mean... I know there wasn't much diversity in the middle ages, but certainly not everybody looked alike.
He couldn't even recognize the general body structure, hair color, or like some facial features of the woman who was supposedly in love with?
The Beast literally keeps Belle captive. At least in Rapunzel the prince wasn't directly responsible for her imprisonment. He was just really neglectful. And John Smith thought all natives were savages until he fell for Pocahontas. Like how is that even remotely okay?
I don't hate fairy tales, you guys. I totally love them and I actually think it's pretty good the princes are flawed, because children need to know that people aren't perfect. Not even Prince Charming and sometimes these flaws are just hilarious.
My favorite fairytale, The Little Mermaid, is no exception.
The prince is either self-centered and willfully blind or the most sarcastic prince in fairy tales, either of which is very interesting to me.
When the Prince learns his parents wanted to be married off to a princess from a neighboring Kingdom he tells the mermaid that, "I have to see this girl, but like, I won't marry her. I couldn't love anybody but the girl who saved me from certain death. You remind me of her. You're the only one that even slightly reminds me of her. And you are so kind, and so fair, and you're so nice to me. You're so devoted. Like if I could choose any bride... I'd choose you."
Then he runs his hand through her hair and she rests her head on his chest and they literally stare out into the sunset.
They stare into the sunset. I'm not kidding that actually happens in the story. It's just like a perfect moment and he basic—basically proposes! And then the next day he meets the other princess and it turns out she's the girl that he thinks saved him.
So he tells the mermaid and I'm actually going to quote directly from the story. I'm not kidding. This is exactly what he says, "You must be so happy for me, because your devotion to me is so great and sincere." So he's basically saying, "You're the most devoted person, so you should be so happy that I'm marrying another girl."
Which I have to believe is either history's greatest example of looking a gift horse in the mouth or the most sarcastic thing said in any fairy tale ever. Because if he realized how ridiculous he sounded by saying, "Aren't you so happy I'm marrying someone else? My darling that I literally proposed to last night?" then that puts the whole story in a new light.
The Little Mermaid is a tragic story of unrequited love, but what if it was a tragic story of unrequited love on both sides?
What if the Prince actually loved the mermaid but couldn't tell if she returned to his feelings because she couldn't speak? That would be doubly tragic and doubly awesome.
I love when things are super sad. But he could also just be a massive jerk. Either way it's fun to think about.
What creeps you out about fairy tales?
Let me know in the comments and subscribe if you want more weird research videos in my attempt to write this novel.
Thanks, you guys. I'll see you soon.
*kiss sound* Bye.
